“Tum tou itni kaali hogayi hou.” “Dhoop mai ziada phirti hou?” “Tumhari skin ki wajah se rishtay nahi ayein gay. “Apni skin ka khayal rakhna shuru karo, beta.”
Often as dark or neutral skinned women, we tend to hear these sentences a lot. Although these seem like baseless statements which should be disregarded, that is certainly not the case. In this article, we will discuss the root of comments such as these, their impacts and why they should stop.
What is Colourism?
Colourism, in short, is discrimination that favours the light-skinned members of an ethnic group. In the generations before us, colourism was largely overlooked. Brands such as Fair & Lovely were outselling and the media stars all being light-skinned are just a few examples. However, with the age of media and awareness, many people have vastly protested against it, rightfully so. Still, colourism persists in our culture.
Why does it exist?
Diving into this question, why does colourism exist? Because racism does. When racism, along with white supremacy and stereotypes, is internalized by society, colourism comes into being. People in their ethnic groups turn against one another. Sometimes to achieve better treatment over the other.
In the context of South Asia, colonialism and its damaging long term effects have left the society prejudiced against one another, deeming the fair ones as the superior.
Colourism in Marriages
The problem of colourism in marriages in Pakistan has been ongoing for decades. Even with the rise in awareness, this still prevails. It is not an uncommon act to see families meet potential spouses and decide whether they approve of it. Often in cases like these, it is the dark-skinned or neutral skinned women who get rejected for a lighter-skinned woman.
Although, this is not a surprise in any way. Websites and newspapers for matchmaking plaster the perfect bride as a fair-skinned woman. This is usually an attempt to attract more customers. Some of these sites have even gone as far as to have their complexions range from “fair” to “wheatish”. A horrifying addition to this would be that many women aren’t even aware of their information being displayed on public spheres such as these.
Moreover, even if the marriage were to go along, it causes problems in children’s futures as well. Future in-laws mainly reject dark-skinned women to avoid their grandchildren from being dark-skinned as well.
The bias for light-skinned women
In various cases, women have come forward to talk about the blatant colourism they have faced. Some of them have heard traumatizing insults calling them impure and unclean. Several women also spoke about their weddings being cancelled last minute due to their skin colour, their wedding photos being lightened and excessive amounts of powder put on their skin to make them look fairer.
The whole notion of wanting a light-skinned bride perpetuates the idea of white supremacy. Millions of young girls grow up disliking the colour of their skins and often comparing themselves to the models presented on TV. They can develop disorders such as Colour Dysmorphia. Skin Bleaching is done to make themselves look presentable to future partners.
Colourism has resulted in the stunting of the romantic lives of millions of women all around the globe.
I’ve spent so much time trying to understand what is so unattractive about me that men shun me.
Drean Mclinton
Another impact of colourism is the reduction of a woman’s personality to her skin colour. This is mainly due to the stereotypes associated with dark-skinned people internalized by an ethnic group. Aside from the fact that these stereotypes are harmful not only for the dark-skinned women but also for the whole group, these continue to exist. Fair-skinned women are seen as higher-class, more fit to be wives while dark-skinned women are usually seen as lower-class, rowdy and need to be “tamed”.
Why should it stop?
From all the information abovementioned, it should be pretty clear why colourism needs to stop. For our youth, we need to end this bias for light-skinned women and show them being dark-skinned does not strip them away of their worth. In times like these, we need to remind everyone that we are all minorities at the end and we should not be discriminating against our own.
Moreover, colourism remains only one aspect of what’s so terrifying about marriage culture in Pakistan. Other factors such as forced marriages, women being treated as prizes, child marriages and marital rape etc are still widespread through our culture.
In an article by Syedha Ghazal Qadri, she talks about the experiences of rishta culture. It is truly a horrendous experience for many women. In the end, all we can do is spread awareness and change our ways in life to create a better world around us.
